What Not to Say to a Hairdresser: A Hilarious Guide
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Going to the hair salon can feel like an exhilarating roller coaster ride. You’re all set to transform your look with a fresh cut or daring color, but those nerves can creep in! While you’re there, it's essential to keep the conversation respectful and fun. Hairdressers are the wizards of the hair world, but there are a few things that can make them roll their eyes or silently scream inside. So, let’s dive into the things you definitely shouldn’t say to your hairdresser—and sprinkle in some laughs along the way!
1. “My old stylist…”
Ah, the classic comparison! It’s like showing up to a new restaurant and saying, “Well, the last place made the best pasta ever!” Instead of telling your new hairdresser how your previous stylist did things, just show them a picture of what you want. Trust that they’ve got the skills to work their magic!
2. “I’m running a little late.” (1 hour later)
Let’s be real: there’s a big difference between “a little late” and “Oops, I’m practically an hour late.” If you find yourself in a hair-raising traffic jam, just be honest. Let your stylist know what’s going on—after all, they have their schedule to consider, too! And remember, being late might just cost you some extra bucks.
3. “My previous stylist messed up my hair.”
Please don’t air your dirty laundry! Trash-talking your last stylist won’t fix your hair; it just creates awkward vibes. Instead, let your new stylist know what you didn’t like and what you want to change. Leave the drama for reality TV!
4. “Can I have a discount?”
Unless you’re at one of those chain salons with “discount days,” asking for a discount can come off as, well, a little rude. Hairdressers are artists who deserve to be paid for their craft, so unless you’re auditioning for a role in Extreme Couponing, let it go!
5. “Let’s skip the consultation.”
Skipping a consultation is like saying, “Let’s skip the safety briefing on this roller coaster!” The consultation isn’t just a formality; it helps your stylist assess your hair and figure out what’s doable. So, let them ask a few questions—it’s for your own good!
6. “Are you sure you know what you’re doing?”
Yikes! That’s like asking a chef if they really know how to make that soufflé. This one’s a big no-no. Instead of doubting their skills, share your nerves and let them reassure you. Remember, they’ve been trained for this!
7. “I don’t care what you do with my hair.”
This phrase can be misleading! If you do have a vision in your mind but don’t express it, your stylist is left guessing—and that can lead to a haircut disaster. If you care (and let’s be honest, you probably do!), communicate your thoughts!
8. “Nothing at all.”
Silence is not golden in the salon! Not saying anything can make the atmosphere awkward. A little chit-chat goes a long way in creating a fun vibe. You don’t have to spill your life story, but a few words will make the experience enjoyable for both of you!
9. “Sorry I’m late for my appointment and didn’t tell you.”
Calling your stylist to say you’re late while you’re already late? Oh boy. This disrupts the flow and can cause headaches for those scheduled after you. Just don’t do it! Try to plan ahead next time!
10. “Here’s a photo of [insert male supermodel]. Can you make me look like him, please?”
Unless you’re already strutting down the runway, this one’s a tall order! While we all want to look fabulous, remember that hair doesn’t work like magic—unless you’ve got a wand!
11. “Please, please, please! Keep your religious views, political views, sexist views, racist views, etc. to yourself.”
Some topics are better left unspoken in the salon. It’s not a debate club—let’s keep the convo light and fun!
12. “I cut my own hair.”
Ah, the dreaded admission! If you cut your own hair and it didn’t turn out as expected, just don’t mention it. Your stylist probably already has an idea of what went wrong when they see your hair. Just say you want a fabulous new look!
13. “I want to go from dark brown to platinum in one session!”
Wow, talk about ambitious! This request is like trying to win the lottery with one ticket. Color changes take time, so be realistic about your hair goals. You’ll end up with healthier hair and a fabulous look if you take it step by step.
14. “It looked better halfway through the haircut. Can we go back?”
Nothing stings more than this comment! Once the hair is gone, it’s gone! Instead of dwelling on what you wish you had, focus on what you can do to make your new look even better.
Conclusion: Keep it Fun and Light!
Navigating the salon experience doesn’t have to be nerve-wracking! Just remember to communicate openly, keep the vibes positive, and avoid saying any of these hair-raising phrases. A good laugh and some light-hearted conversation will make for a fabulous experience, and you’ll leave the salon feeling like a million bucks!
And if you really want to impress your stylist, consider rocking a funny hairdresser t-shirt or travel mug on your next visit. It’s a great icebreaker and might just earn you a few extra laughs (and a fab haircut)!